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Curious Case of Eddy Curry  by Stan Silliman humor sports comedy cartoons articles






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By Stan Silliman
       
Curious Case of Eddy Curry

        Eddy Curry can’t pay his bills. Repeat: a guy who makes $ 10.5 million per year in the NBA can’t pay back a $ 570,000 loan, can’t even make a payment.

    Darn you, Eddy Curry. We said we weren’t going to write about you. Not after we wrote about you running down the hallways of the Oklahoma City Skirvin Hotel claiming to be chased by Effie the Ghost. (See cartoon below)Teammates say your hall scamper was the fastest they’ve ever seen you run. Your coach went looking for Effie, hoping to hire her as a trainer. Now, because you stiffed a Las Vegas loan firm called Allstar Capital we have to put you in another column. We don’t want to, we have to.

    A New York State Supreme Court Judge ordered Knick center Eddy Curry to pay $ 75,000 per month plus interest on a $ 570,000 loan he took out in late 2008.
The 85% interest inflated his original note to over $ 1.2 million dollars.

    In a nutshell: Eddy Curry makes $ 10 million per year and either because of injuries or ineffectiveness has played in only 10 games for the Knicks in 2 years. In terms of hopes and dreams, Eddy Curry has screwed more New York City residents than Bernie Madoff.  Eddy Curry is not well liked by Knicks fans. Carnegie Deli named a pudding after Eddy Curry – chocolate, but very soft... very, very soft. That may a part of Eddy’s problem, not only soft on the court but soft-hearted, generous beyond belief. Even the attorney for Allstar Capital, Donald David, was impressed with Eddy Curry’s generosity “He appears to have taken it upon himself to support every person named Curry on the East Coast.”

    Curry went to court trying to get relief on his Vegas loan which carries 85% interest, which is LEGAL in Nevada. We guessed Nevada passed that law as soon as they legalized brothels. Why should brothel customers be the only one getting… you get the idea. 85% is what you get when you rack up $ 30,000 per month in household expenses, not counting $ 6000 a month for a personal chef or $ 1075 per month for cable or $ 17,000 per month supporting relatives.  85% interest is what you get when ants stand taller than your credit rating. Actually that’s probably an insult… to ants.  85% interest is what you get when you’ve borrowed money from other players in the league who you might happen to play against. Except when you see a game where one of your creditors might be playing opposite you, you find a reason not to get in the game. This may partially explain why only 10 games in two years: knee cap preservation. 85% interest is what you get when your Chicago home is in foreclosure AND $ 207,000 of your wages is being garnished each month.
Curious Case of Eddy Curry  by Stan Silliman humor sports comedy cartoons articles
    Actually the interest rate may have come as a surprise to Mr. Curry. It may have been a matter of Eddy not listening distinctly.  According to an internet poster, Curry may have heard the pitch from the Allstar Capital loan officer like this: “We don’t do this for everyone, but for you, Eddy, five percent.”

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