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Sayers-Urlacher Squabble Bears Look  by Stan Silliman humor sports comedy cartoons articles






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By Stan Silliman
       
Sayers-Urlacher Squabble Bears Look

        All-Pro running back Gale Sayers expressed displeasure with how his old football team, the Chicago Bears, is being run. Oft injured and bald linebacker Brian Urlacher expressed displeasure at Gale Sayers’ expression of displeasure. Now, before you get in the act and express displeasure at two beloved Bears expressing at each other, just allow them their say. And also, before you get upset at us, as non-Chicagoans, for using the above word “beloved” just know we didn’t steal the word from Oprah. We only borrowed it.  
    Gale Sayers is unhappy with quarterback Jay Cutler, unhappy with Urlacher and unhappy with Lovie Smith, the coach. Urlacher shot back that Sayers should shut up because he never won a Super Bowl nor even a playoff game.

    We side with Sayers. Sayers made these statements while addressing middle school students at Boys Town in Nebraska. Sayers is one of the calmest and reserved people you’ll meet and was merely giving his honest opinion when asked. Secondly we side with Sayers because Gale was a lead character in the best “chick-flick for men” ever made, “Brian’s Song”. In that movie, Billy Dee Williams played Gale to James Caan’s Brian Piccolo. Brian Piccolo was a southern curly-haired Italian running back who competed with as well as sharing the same Chicago Bears backfield with Gale Sayers. They were friends and expressed their friendship with good old-fashioned slow motion running. Nothing bonds two competitive football guys like sweat-drenched slow motion sprints. Here’s the sad part: Brian Piccolo dies young, struck down by disease just when he starts to really help the Bears.  This is the “chick-flick for men” part. While some chick flicks require two-hankies, this was a half-tissue box with loud man-type nose honks.
Sayers-Urlacher Squabble Bears Look  by Stan Silliman humor sports comedy cartoons articles 
    We also have a second reason for siding with Sayers. I wrote the lyrics for “Brian’s Song”. Nobody asked me to. It just seemed necessary to fill a void when the tissue box dropped to half-full. Also, don’t bother humming along. I also changed the tune as it didn’t work with our new lyrics. Here it is:

    Piccilo, Piccilo, Picccc-i-looooo
    He’s a running back, running back, hey, y’know
    He made a friend of Gale Sayers
    He made a friend of Gale Sayers
    Gale was a guy who really cares

    One was white and one was bla-ck
    That was a big deal, once, way ba-ck
    One was from the South with curly hair
    One was a Jayhawk, really square

    Piccilo, Piccolo, Picccc-i-looooo
    He’s a running back, running back, he died, y’know
    It was sad ‘cause he used to run in great slow-mo
    Piccilo, Piccilo, Picccc-i-looooo

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