Scene:
In the Jacksonson
Courtyard in Lakerland.
The grand
Pooh-bah, Master Jacksonson, also known as the Archbishop of
Lakerland, Lord High Admiral, First Lord of the Treasury, Official
Pacifier, Dater of the Daughter and Zensu of the Zenators is
addressing Shaqeson.
“It is
said,” begins the Pooh-bah “that you, O Mighty Shaqeson, wish
not to fulfill your obligation of marriage to Kobe-Ko. You realize,
that I, as First Lord of the Treasury and as Chief Paymaster in Charge
can propose a special law which would cover all expenses. I could use
my special powers of accountancy in such a way, that I as Lord high
Auditor, could never discover my own malfeasance. However as the
Archbishop of Lakerland, it would be my duty to denounce my own
dishonesty and give myself into my own custody, as Chief of Police.”
To which
the Shaqeson says “Huh?”
“You
realize, don’t you, that I’m willing to degrade myself for the
sake of your union,” says the Pooh-bah. “You need only to co-operate,
fulfill your obligation and go through with nuptials. If only for a few
years.”
“But that
Kobe-Ko is ugly. Have you seen her without her make-up? She’d
make a Sumo wrestler skip dinner.”
“Ah, but
Shaqeson,” the wise Pooh-bah counters, “Kobe-Ko is an acquired
taste. Her face may be frightening to some. Her ways seem a little
selfish but she can produce diamonds of untold value, if you’ll allow….”
“Besides,
I have a new desire … Payton-Ki and she feeds me well.”
The
spotlight shines in the corner on Payton-Ki:
“I
sit in silence as the Shaq dunks deep
I
feed him so he can op-e-rate in his sleep
To
him I’ll pass, I’ll pass to his big mass
For
I want him only happy, him happy I will keep.”
Then
the spotlight turns to Kobe-Ko
“He’s
always talking about his big toe
I
have soreness too, and yet I make a go
I
make accommodations, he should keep his obligations
We’re
bound to our relations, He shouldn’t tell me no.”
The spotlight flashes on the
grand Pooh-bah
Jacksonson
“The moon, the sun, the
stars
Are
lined up well
We’ll
hear from them a story
And
what a story they’ll tell
We’ll
have a marriage of all three
But
how we’ll so do … a mystery
But
as the Lord High Lawmaker
I
know I’ll make it happen, See.
For
I have no diffidence or shyness
For
I can bend the rules
That’s
the perk of my most Highness
And
the Zen of me… is cools”
Shaqeson, Kobe-Ko and Payton-Ki meet at stage front
We
are destiny
We’ll
play nice together
For
all the rest to see
We
can be…
We
can be…
We
can be…
A
family.
